Weight loss shmeight loss...

I am a moderately large sized girl with an above average appetite and a seriously below average metabolism. The result? Weight gain just by breathing in air. As a kid I was always on the chubbier side and I never really had a problem with it. However, people always seem to have a problem with chubby women. I mean let's just all agree that if no one cared and if it didn't matter, we would all eat three croissants a day smeared with butter and few tall glasses of vanilla milkshakes. Life isn't so kind though. In the last one year, my chubbiness superseded my previous chubby times. I am married and just like me my hubby is a foodie. Hence, ever since we got married, I sort of let go and started eating as I pleased. The result? + 30 lbs. I got so laid back that I didn't step on the weighing scale and just sort of wore clothes that were stretchy so not to realize how out of shape I was getting.

Anyways, 2 weeks ago I decided to go on a 'regime' to try and lose some weight and get into shape. I cut out sugar, refined carbs, fat. When I say cut out, I don't eat sugar at all but I do eat brown rice (tennis ball sized amount and only once a day) and my fats include cooking with Pam cooking spray. I've been eating grilled chicken tenders, lettuce, tomatoes, avocados, snap peas, a few nuts, fish, oatmeal, etc. Not all at once of course, but those items constitute most of my meals. My workouts include walking on the treadmill at 3.0 mph with ankle weights. I do a few dumbbell exercises and crunches too.

So far I've lost a pound. Just 1 pound!!!! It is so frustrating. My hubby says I look a bit slimmer (either he's lying or he's encouraging me to keep going lol). I don't feel happy though. I am deprived of serotonin-releasing carbs and I am wide awake at night because of I don't have a full stomach lol. I know there are tons of girls out there who have always watched what they eat and so its a way of life for them. Not for me. I love food. I live for food. If it were upto me, I would eat as much carbs as I wanted, smeared with as much butter as I waned. But like I said before, life isn't so kind. People are not so kind. Bulges are not forgiven. So I wonder, at the end of all this regime, hopefully when I've lost all that additional weight, I will look better but will I feel happy with so many sacrifices? I am not so sure.